Image: DON’T YOU WISH YOUR DAUGHTER WAS HOT LIKE MINE. Mixed Media Collage. 15 x 15 cm. 2015.

LOOKING HOT IN LOCKDOWN.

If you are still in lockdown because you can’t work out if the message means you should or should not go to work, and did they mean yesterday or tomorrow, or if can’t get there anyway because you can’t use public transport and it’s too far to walk, or cycle, and you don’t own a bike, and is it safe anyway, then I’m sure you’re not alone. One thing you may be missing, as you trudge aimlessly from room to room in your last years faded onesie, wondering which one of the many half finished jobs you optimistically started, you should finish, which you could start after finishing that box set, or trying to get your head around level three maths, may be having a hair appointment. Beards, hippy hair styles and comb overs are only three of the unexpected consequences of the lockdown. Others include roots revealing that you weren’t born blonde , uncontrolled split ends and dangerously vampurial nails. If the mirror on the wall has suddenly forgotten what you look like, don’t despair, you can console yourself that in next years Glastonbury you will fit in well. Just keep following the science by saying to yourself, looking hot is just a state of mind.